It's actually a struggle to want to live at the moment. I dread waking up. My world is spiralling into a smaller circle than ever before. I just want it all to stop. I can't talk to anyone without burdening them with my black world. I'm scared that the masks are cracking and I can't hold it all together any more.
My life feels so disassociated and disconnected from the real world. It's like I'm watching it all happen around me. I need a room where I can exist and not have money worries. I feel like a malfunction of life. I just don't seem to be able to function as an adult. I didn't function as a child. What a seriously screwed up human being.
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