In so much pain today with 7th week of headaches and feeling so tired. Just want to take an overdose and end it all. The only concern is Georgie my precious one and who'd be there for her, my dearest friend.
I've really compromised my morals this weekend and feel awful. I had enough emotional baggage without adding to it. What is it about me that people don't like? I just want out from it all. Need to tidy up first though so a mess isn't left for anyone and I couldn't do it here as that would have haunting memories for this room and house owner. I don't want to live any more. I'm worn out trying to make life feel okay. I just can't connect to people and be part of normal life.
My chance of marriage and children has gone and I've moved to that middle aged (don't fit in anywhere) category. I don't choose life any more. I don't want these lessons of loneliness, pretending to be strong and no one to talk properly to. Just feel a wreck, want to sleep and never wake up.
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