It's hard to describe being stuck in time, but that's how it feels. Like floating in a time freeze. Time ticks on, the sun rises and sets, yet the layers of complexity of life remain the same.
I feel like life has passed me by and I've missed out. I feel like things are too late. It's like my future has bypassed me and I've lived in a parallel world with invisible barriers.
Being alone feels like the sad realisation of my future. A dawning that I don't want to face. What is it that I'm doing wrong in life to not be loved or wanted? People say "you're great, you're amazing", but they're just words as I'm still alone, so I can't be that amazing can I?
Life has beaten any oomph out of me. I don't like bad feeling or arguments, yet women who behave like that always have a partner and men wanting them. It's not who I am. Many times I feel like a Victorian, old fashioned woman that no one wants. I was born at the wrong time.
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